Long over due update.

Or is it?? I don't even know if anyone looks at my blog, since I have Facebook! (Which is much easier than blogging, I think.)

Anyways! Nothing new going on really.. We're both just working and having fun with our puppy, Samson!! He is such a stud, we are crazy about him!!!

I recently took up running (again.) I took wayyyy too long of a break just before the wedding, and didn't start up again until about.. October? Laaaame Liz. Lame. But anyways.. I have been doing really well with it this time around! I try to run every other day, if possible. And I am definately getting stronger! :) My first 10k is this Sunday, in DC! And then I am planning on going to Florida for a 15k in March, then quite possibly the half marathon in SLC in April! (Depends if I can afford all of this travel.. Hahaha.)

Anyways.. Sorry I am so lame and boring. I will post pics soon, I promise!!

Getting Personal.

This post is about my mom. Something I don't talk about very much, but should. And thanks to my good friend, Kaylee, she opened up about losing her little brother. And it made me realize that it is good to open up, and let it out.

Some of you may think I am sharing too much, but it's my opinion. And I think it's okay if people know.



SYRACUSE -Mary Beth passed away in her home on Tuesday, September 19, 2006. Born to Blaine and Velma Fisher on July 30, 1950, she was raised in West Point, Utah.

She was valedictorian of her 1968 Clearfield High School graduating class. She attended Weber State College where she participated in the La Dioneda sorority and graduated as a registered nurse. She married Scot Denhalter in 1972 in the Ogden LDS Temple. Her pride and joy were their children: Joshua, Rachel (LaFon), Joseph, Sarah (Buttars), Elizabeth and Seth. She was a loving and devoted mother and caring grandmother to three grandchildren.

Funeral services were held Tuesday, September 26, at 11 a.m. at the Syracuse Stake Center, 1350 S. 1800 W.

Interment, West Point Cemetery.

There you see it. My mom was smart, beautiful, well liked, etc.. And when I was about 5 years old, she gave that all away for an addiction to pain pills. I never really found out what STARTED her addiction, all I know is it ruined her.

Seeing as how I was only 5 and Seth was 3 when her addiction began, we never really got to know our REAL mom. Not like everyone else knew her. Drugs transformed her into something none of us liked. Growing up with this was really hard, especially because I never knew what was going on. Her addiction was never explained to me or Seth. We kind of had to figure it out on our own. After all of her car accidents, and DUI's, it was pretty clear, something was wrong. And as I got older, I just became extremely mad at her. I had SO much anger towards my mom, all the time. I couldn't stand to be around her, and when I HAD to be, I was rude. Oh I can't tell you how much I regret that.. Addiction is something I didn't understand. But now that I do, I would have handled everything so much better.

The one and only time I ever saw my mom 100% sober, was right after she got out of prison, I took her grocery shopping. It was the weirdest thing ever, but also very awesome.

As you can imagine, 15 years of drug abuse will take a toll on someones body. My mom's autopsy report showed respiratory failure, due to drug abuse. Her body just gave up on her.

2 weeks before my mom passed away, I was getting gas at the gas station across the street from her apartment. (Where I ALWAYS got gas.) But this time, something just came over me.. Telling me I should go see her. So I did. We talked, caught up, then she asked me to drop her off at the movies. I asked her if her car was having problems (she had a POS) and she told me "No. I had my license suspended." And I just wanted to scream, yell throw something. "AGAIN? Are you kidding me? After everything you've gone through? Car accident after car accident, jail, PRISON!" But I didn't. I was calm. I simply said, "okay, lets go." I was nice to her the entire drive, hugged and kissed her goodbye. 2 weeks later, I got the call she had passed away.

I am SO thankful that I wasn't my normal, mean self. For once, I went to see her willingly and took her somewhere with out acting like it was a huge hassle.

I miss my mom every day. I wonder constantly what life would be like if she were still here. It makes me incredibly sad to know that my kids will never meet their grandma Denhalter. Shit, Erik never even met my mom. She would have loved him, so much.

All in all, I think god took her because he knew she couldn't get better. She was sick for 15 years, and wasn't anywhere near close to getting better. I feel like he wanted to take her away from the pain, and give her something better.

I forgive my mom for her addiction. I just wish I would have done it sooner.

Samson!

I am pleased to announce the new addition to our family! Samson Smith!
He is SUCH a freakin cutie, we love him sooooo much!



My sister flew him out last Wednesday night, and we've been having a blast with him ever since. He is kind of a stinker at times.. But for how young he is, he is doing really really well! Of course we've had a few potty accidents, and he barks when left alone, but he is learning how to use his potty pads and learning not to bark. He is such a good boy! So playful, and so damn cute!!

Here are some pics of his cuteness!

Things I'm thinking about, but have no one to talk to.

Wishing things could have turned out differently with my mom. Life is unfair sometimes.
I miss my dad, I hope he is doing okay.
I can feel myself losing some of my closest friends.
I need to watch my nieces and nephews grow.
I miss my sisters. And my brothers too.
Women who are over 30, should act like it.
SAMSON. 3 weeks.
Boobs. I want some.
I wonder what I will look like with no acne?
People who are shitty friends, shouldn't be friends with anyone. At all.
I want to go back to our resort in Cancun. Everything was perfect there.
Oh and I want to get married all over again too! It was so amazing, but goes by too damn fast!
I hate hate hate when people are mean to me for no reason at all.

My vows to Erik

I thought I'd share my words with those of you who couldn't hear them on the wedding day. Enjoy.




Erik,

You are my best friend, my rock, and the love of my life.

I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to be standing right here today.

You are the most amazing person I have ever met, and I love you more than any words can express.

You truly bring out the best in me, and for that I thank you.

I'd be so honored to be your wife, and to have you as my husband.

I promise to encourage you, laugh with you, be there in times of need.

I promise to to love you through all of the good, and all of the bad.

I promise to respect you, honor you, and cherish everything we have together.

I promise to love you forever.

There is no other way I'd want to spend my life then being next to you.

Laughing with you, crying with you, and just being us.

All of these things I promise you, today and forever.

MAJOR catch up.

I'm a huge slacker, I know. And it's not like I don't have time, because I do! I sit at work all day with nothing to do! I am just lazy! Haha, so sorry!
So! Catch up.. Mostly everyone knows everything because of Facebook. That is why I never bother updating this thing. I think the only reason I am, is because of those who don't have facebook!
So.. yeah. I am a married woman now. And it is AMAZING. Just yesterday Erik and I were saying how awesome it is that we're just as in love today as we were 3 years ago. I honestly don't think that love will EVER fade. I know that sounds cliche, and some of you might laugh. But I am dead serious. Sure we have out ups and downs, we fight, what normal couple doesn't? But there is just this amazing connection between us. Our love is something amazing, and we are both so lucky we found each other!!
The wedding was beyond amazing. I can't stop thinking about it! I wish we could do it all over again, it goes by way too damn fast! And there are so many people I didn't get to spend much time with that I would have loved to. Even people I didn't get to say hi to! It was craziness all day! (I'm sure a lot of you can relate!)
I know on my previous post I gave you all a link to my amazingly talented cousins blog, but I figured I'd just post a couple of those pics anyways. (Those are the only professional wedding pics we have so far.) We should be getting them all back any day now! YAY! And then I will post some more :)




Oh and here is my gorgeous rock! He did sooo good, didn't he? :) (Not the best pic, sorry.)


Okay so, BEST.WEDDING.EVER. You all got that.. hahaha, but really. I will post more pics as soon as I get them.
After the wedding we headed to Vegas. BOOO, it sucked. I felt like it was over rated. BUT I do feel if I went into it, knowing what to expect, then I would have had a better time. So yeah, Vegas was not my cup of tea. I much rather would have spent that time in Utah with my family and friends! (Lesson learned.)
After Vegas.. CANCUN!! Ahhh... our honeymoon was UNREAL. It was so unbelievably amazing. Neither of us had been on a REAL vacation like that before, so it was awesome. We got there and couldn't keep our jaws shut for hours, haha. SO relaxing, so gorgeous, and SOOO fun.
We stayed at a very private resort, kind of a ways away from the main hotel zone in Cancun. It's called Excellence Playa Mujeres. I would HIGHLY recommend it if you are thinking about going to Mexico. It's all inclusive, it had like 7 pools, 11 bars, 8 restaurants, (give or take those numbers) Seriously everything was free. There were things that were extra, but mostly everything was included in the cost. (Besides the tips, you gotta tip!)
Our room was AMAZING. We had our own mini bar, FULLY stocked with liquor bottles, beer, wine, candy, soda, water. And it was re-stocked daily. We could get room service as much as we wanted, it was awesome.
We also went parasailing (that was extra.) It was scary as hell. It's supposed to be relaxing? But it was windy as hell that day and they had to take us down early because the wind almost knocked us out!
Here are a few pics from the trip!!














And now... We're back to reality. And it sucks! BUT on an AWESOME freakin note, we are finally getting a new member of our family!! A puppy!! His name is Samson, and he was born a few weeks ago. He's a brown and white Shih Tzu and he is adorable. We can't wait to have him!! My sister Sarah is flying him out to us in September (he was born in Utah, so it works out that way!) It's like a two-fer. PLUS after 2 years of living here, I have yet to have a visitor. So she will be the first! And it's about damn time if I do say so myself!!
Here is a pic of the little guy!! (He's on the right) He doesn't look like a Shih Tzu yet, because he's so small!


And last.. I cut my bangs!! Ahh.. weird. But I like them! And so does Erik, a lot! Awesome :)

It sure feels good to be Mrs. Smith

That's right, I am now a married woman! And could not be happier!! Thanks so much to everyone who shared our special day, it means a lot!
I will post pics as soon as I get them. But for now.. Check out this post.
My cousin was our photographer and she is amazing, and so talented. Here is a sneak peek that she posted to her blog. Check it.