Long over due update.

Or is it?? I don't even know if anyone looks at my blog, since I have Facebook! (Which is much easier than blogging, I think.)

Anyways! Nothing new going on really.. We're both just working and having fun with our puppy, Samson!! He is such a stud, we are crazy about him!!!

I recently took up running (again.) I took wayyyy too long of a break just before the wedding, and didn't start up again until about.. October? Laaaame Liz. Lame. But anyways.. I have been doing really well with it this time around! I try to run every other day, if possible. And I am definately getting stronger! :) My first 10k is this Sunday, in DC! And then I am planning on going to Florida for a 15k in March, then quite possibly the half marathon in SLC in April! (Depends if I can afford all of this travel.. Hahaha.)

Anyways.. Sorry I am so lame and boring. I will post pics soon, I promise!!

Getting Personal.

This post is about my mom. Something I don't talk about very much, but should. And thanks to my good friend, Kaylee, she opened up about losing her little brother. And it made me realize that it is good to open up, and let it out.

Some of you may think I am sharing too much, but it's my opinion. And I think it's okay if people know.



SYRACUSE -Mary Beth passed away in her home on Tuesday, September 19, 2006. Born to Blaine and Velma Fisher on July 30, 1950, she was raised in West Point, Utah.

She was valedictorian of her 1968 Clearfield High School graduating class. She attended Weber State College where she participated in the La Dioneda sorority and graduated as a registered nurse. She married Scot Denhalter in 1972 in the Ogden LDS Temple. Her pride and joy were their children: Joshua, Rachel (LaFon), Joseph, Sarah (Buttars), Elizabeth and Seth. She was a loving and devoted mother and caring grandmother to three grandchildren.

Funeral services were held Tuesday, September 26, at 11 a.m. at the Syracuse Stake Center, 1350 S. 1800 W.

Interment, West Point Cemetery.

There you see it. My mom was smart, beautiful, well liked, etc.. And when I was about 5 years old, she gave that all away for an addiction to pain pills. I never really found out what STARTED her addiction, all I know is it ruined her.

Seeing as how I was only 5 and Seth was 3 when her addiction began, we never really got to know our REAL mom. Not like everyone else knew her. Drugs transformed her into something none of us liked. Growing up with this was really hard, especially because I never knew what was going on. Her addiction was never explained to me or Seth. We kind of had to figure it out on our own. After all of her car accidents, and DUI's, it was pretty clear, something was wrong. And as I got older, I just became extremely mad at her. I had SO much anger towards my mom, all the time. I couldn't stand to be around her, and when I HAD to be, I was rude. Oh I can't tell you how much I regret that.. Addiction is something I didn't understand. But now that I do, I would have handled everything so much better.

The one and only time I ever saw my mom 100% sober, was right after she got out of prison, I took her grocery shopping. It was the weirdest thing ever, but also very awesome.

As you can imagine, 15 years of drug abuse will take a toll on someones body. My mom's autopsy report showed respiratory failure, due to drug abuse. Her body just gave up on her.

2 weeks before my mom passed away, I was getting gas at the gas station across the street from her apartment. (Where I ALWAYS got gas.) But this time, something just came over me.. Telling me I should go see her. So I did. We talked, caught up, then she asked me to drop her off at the movies. I asked her if her car was having problems (she had a POS) and she told me "No. I had my license suspended." And I just wanted to scream, yell throw something. "AGAIN? Are you kidding me? After everything you've gone through? Car accident after car accident, jail, PRISON!" But I didn't. I was calm. I simply said, "okay, lets go." I was nice to her the entire drive, hugged and kissed her goodbye. 2 weeks later, I got the call she had passed away.

I am SO thankful that I wasn't my normal, mean self. For once, I went to see her willingly and took her somewhere with out acting like it was a huge hassle.

I miss my mom every day. I wonder constantly what life would be like if she were still here. It makes me incredibly sad to know that my kids will never meet their grandma Denhalter. Shit, Erik never even met my mom. She would have loved him, so much.

All in all, I think god took her because he knew she couldn't get better. She was sick for 15 years, and wasn't anywhere near close to getting better. I feel like he wanted to take her away from the pain, and give her something better.

I forgive my mom for her addiction. I just wish I would have done it sooner.

Samson!

I am pleased to announce the new addition to our family! Samson Smith!
He is SUCH a freakin cutie, we love him sooooo much!



My sister flew him out last Wednesday night, and we've been having a blast with him ever since. He is kind of a stinker at times.. But for how young he is, he is doing really really well! Of course we've had a few potty accidents, and he barks when left alone, but he is learning how to use his potty pads and learning not to bark. He is such a good boy! So playful, and so damn cute!!

Here are some pics of his cuteness!

Things I'm thinking about, but have no one to talk to.

Wishing things could have turned out differently with my mom. Life is unfair sometimes.
I miss my dad, I hope he is doing okay.
I can feel myself losing some of my closest friends.
I need to watch my nieces and nephews grow.
I miss my sisters. And my brothers too.
Women who are over 30, should act like it.
SAMSON. 3 weeks.
Boobs. I want some.
I wonder what I will look like with no acne?
People who are shitty friends, shouldn't be friends with anyone. At all.
I want to go back to our resort in Cancun. Everything was perfect there.
Oh and I want to get married all over again too! It was so amazing, but goes by too damn fast!
I hate hate hate when people are mean to me for no reason at all.

My vows to Erik

I thought I'd share my words with those of you who couldn't hear them on the wedding day. Enjoy.




Erik,

You are my best friend, my rock, and the love of my life.

I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to be standing right here today.

You are the most amazing person I have ever met, and I love you more than any words can express.

You truly bring out the best in me, and for that I thank you.

I'd be so honored to be your wife, and to have you as my husband.

I promise to encourage you, laugh with you, be there in times of need.

I promise to to love you through all of the good, and all of the bad.

I promise to respect you, honor you, and cherish everything we have together.

I promise to love you forever.

There is no other way I'd want to spend my life then being next to you.

Laughing with you, crying with you, and just being us.

All of these things I promise you, today and forever.

MAJOR catch up.

I'm a huge slacker, I know. And it's not like I don't have time, because I do! I sit at work all day with nothing to do! I am just lazy! Haha, so sorry!
So! Catch up.. Mostly everyone knows everything because of Facebook. That is why I never bother updating this thing. I think the only reason I am, is because of those who don't have facebook!
So.. yeah. I am a married woman now. And it is AMAZING. Just yesterday Erik and I were saying how awesome it is that we're just as in love today as we were 3 years ago. I honestly don't think that love will EVER fade. I know that sounds cliche, and some of you might laugh. But I am dead serious. Sure we have out ups and downs, we fight, what normal couple doesn't? But there is just this amazing connection between us. Our love is something amazing, and we are both so lucky we found each other!!
The wedding was beyond amazing. I can't stop thinking about it! I wish we could do it all over again, it goes by way too damn fast! And there are so many people I didn't get to spend much time with that I would have loved to. Even people I didn't get to say hi to! It was craziness all day! (I'm sure a lot of you can relate!)
I know on my previous post I gave you all a link to my amazingly talented cousins blog, but I figured I'd just post a couple of those pics anyways. (Those are the only professional wedding pics we have so far.) We should be getting them all back any day now! YAY! And then I will post some more :)




Oh and here is my gorgeous rock! He did sooo good, didn't he? :) (Not the best pic, sorry.)


Okay so, BEST.WEDDING.EVER. You all got that.. hahaha, but really. I will post more pics as soon as I get them.
After the wedding we headed to Vegas. BOOO, it sucked. I felt like it was over rated. BUT I do feel if I went into it, knowing what to expect, then I would have had a better time. So yeah, Vegas was not my cup of tea. I much rather would have spent that time in Utah with my family and friends! (Lesson learned.)
After Vegas.. CANCUN!! Ahhh... our honeymoon was UNREAL. It was so unbelievably amazing. Neither of us had been on a REAL vacation like that before, so it was awesome. We got there and couldn't keep our jaws shut for hours, haha. SO relaxing, so gorgeous, and SOOO fun.
We stayed at a very private resort, kind of a ways away from the main hotel zone in Cancun. It's called Excellence Playa Mujeres. I would HIGHLY recommend it if you are thinking about going to Mexico. It's all inclusive, it had like 7 pools, 11 bars, 8 restaurants, (give or take those numbers) Seriously everything was free. There were things that were extra, but mostly everything was included in the cost. (Besides the tips, you gotta tip!)
Our room was AMAZING. We had our own mini bar, FULLY stocked with liquor bottles, beer, wine, candy, soda, water. And it was re-stocked daily. We could get room service as much as we wanted, it was awesome.
We also went parasailing (that was extra.) It was scary as hell. It's supposed to be relaxing? But it was windy as hell that day and they had to take us down early because the wind almost knocked us out!
Here are a few pics from the trip!!














And now... We're back to reality. And it sucks! BUT on an AWESOME freakin note, we are finally getting a new member of our family!! A puppy!! His name is Samson, and he was born a few weeks ago. He's a brown and white Shih Tzu and he is adorable. We can't wait to have him!! My sister Sarah is flying him out to us in September (he was born in Utah, so it works out that way!) It's like a two-fer. PLUS after 2 years of living here, I have yet to have a visitor. So she will be the first! And it's about damn time if I do say so myself!!
Here is a pic of the little guy!! (He's on the right) He doesn't look like a Shih Tzu yet, because he's so small!


And last.. I cut my bangs!! Ahh.. weird. But I like them! And so does Erik, a lot! Awesome :)

It sure feels good to be Mrs. Smith

That's right, I am now a married woman! And could not be happier!! Thanks so much to everyone who shared our special day, it means a lot!
I will post pics as soon as I get them. But for now.. Check out this post.
My cousin was our photographer and she is amazing, and so talented. Here is a sneak peek that she posted to her blog. Check it.

13 Days!

As I sit here at work, with nothing to do.. All I can think about is July.

-Marrying the love of my life.
-Seeing friends and family I haven't seen in YEARS.
-Seeing friends and family I haven't seen in months.
-Having the time of my LIFE at the party which will be.. My wedding.
-My first trip to Vegas
-Spending a week in Cancun with my new husband.

Ahh July, get here faster. Please.

Puppy Update

Our application for Eli was turned down.. They didn't say why, but I am assuming that it's because we don't have a vet out here to refer us.. I am so bummed, I cried when Erik sent me the email. But I guess it just means I should continue the search for our new addition, and hopefully Eli gets a new, happy, safe home soon.

Summer 2010

Ahhh! 27 DAYS! I can't believe how close it is.
I am soooooo pumped to get married, go to Utah, Vegas, CANCUN, see my entire family and all my friends! This summer truely is going to be the best summer EVER.
Not to mention my birthday is the week after we get home from Cancun, AND we are getting a puppy!! {yay!}

So.. my dad turned 60 this summer! {June 2nd} and my siblings threw him this awesome party, that I sadly missed. The worst part about living so far from UT, is missing all the monumental things like that. I HATE IT. But anyways..
Here is the handsome birthday boy. I love him so much!


Here are my nieces and nephews eating at his birthday dinner. (Cutest kids EVER.)


And here is Eli...
My great friend Whitney knew I was looking to adopt a puppy. And found the EXACT breed I want, and semi close to where I live! (Upstate NY, but only a short road trip away.)
I want him soooo bad guys, you have no idea. He is so damn precious!! We have a lot going against us, because this shelter is SUPER strict about who adopts their dogs.. But pleeeease keep your fingers crossed for us!!
Btw.. if he isn't too used to being called Eli, we might change his name to Samson :)

Yeah I suck at this.

So not a lot has been going on lately, I just suck at updating this thing. Haha.
Well lets see.. I think we have about 47 days until the wedding! Crazy. Time is seriously flying so fast! I just went to Utah this past weekend to have my family bridal showers (one with Erik's fam and one with mine.) Both went very well, and I was spoiled. I also met up with our wedding planner and made some final decisons. Now I feel like SO much stress has been lifted off my shoulders, it's awesome!
It was SO good to see the family and spend time with my sisters and nieces and nephews. I miss them all so much. I can't wait until the wedding when I can see my WHOLE family, and all of my friends. (Since my trip was so short, I missed seeing tons of people.) It's freakin hard to see everyone while you're out there. I used to worry that people would get mad at me, but I can't worry about that. Because I can't be in a million places at one time. I swear, after being in Utah, I could use a vacation. Hahaha, it's just so busy, and non stop the entire time. (But you know I love it.)
Anyways! I know I gave you all a sneak peek at our engagements.. Well here are some more!!







We have lots more, but I am too lazy to resize them all to fit in the blog. I freakin hate how my blog cuts off my pics! Does anyone know how I can fix that??

I can't wait to marry Erik! And I definitely can't wait for our honeymoon...

Wedding plans...

I seriously cannot believe that we're getting married in 76 days!! I swear it was just yesterday that we set the date.
I am so lucky to have Erik. He is so sweet, caring, affectionate, funny, loving, and just plain amazing. I love him so much! :)

Well.. I was going to post some pics of all the awesome goodies I just bought for the wedding. But I figured I shouldn't show every part of my wedding before it happens! Haha.

I bought CUTE yellow shoes that match our color theme, an awesome awesome garter set, cute cake topper, and a guest tree that I have been in love with since the first time I saw it. I can't wait to show everyone! I am so excited for the wedding. Everything totally screams Erik and Liz! Yeah, it might not be "traditional" but it's us. And that is alllll that matters :)

Sneak Peek..

Erik might just kill me for this.. (Just kidding)
But I am too excited to not give you all {a small} glimpse of our engagements :)




Sorry if they cut off a little, I wish my pics didn't do that!

Crying at my desk, what else is new? ;)

I cannot stop reading this

I started from the very beginning. (June 2004) And I am reading every post. I love this blog, and I love this guy. Even though he makes me cry every 5 seconds.

In love with this!!

So I've been hunting on etsy.com for the perfect veil, for quite awhile!! I couldn't find the right peice/clip with the right veil! So finally I just bought two seperate pieces, and I am going to put them together so they look like one!! Smart right? Yeah I thought so too... :)

Tell me this isn't amazing.. I am soooo in love with it!


And then this will be the veil I have coming out of the feather clip! (it might not look exactly like it does on this girl, but it's the same birdcage.)



You like?? :)

"I'm coming up only to hold you under.."

A few facts..

I am a girl in love, he is amazing, and I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life as his wife. <3 07/07/10

I love music as much as I love Erik. (And that is a lot.) I was raised in a music loving family. Almost everyone in my family can sing, or play an instrument, or both. (Except me of course.) Maybe if I tried.. Music just has a way with me.. It understands me when no one else can. It seems like music always knows how I am feeling, and plays the perfect song at the perfect moment. If I had to pick between being deaf or blind, I'd choose to lose my sight. I don't think I could ever go without hearing music. "I'm coming up only to hold you under. I'm coming up only to show you wrong. And to know you is hard; we wonder, To know you all wrong; we warn."

I love to write. Although I never write anymore.. It seems like my best writing days were during my darkest days. And once I started having true happiness, I can't find the words to write anymore. So I guess I gotta take the good with the bad?

I think I have an obsession with television.. Sad I know. I went pretty much my whole childhood with out tv. My dad got rid of it one day, and never got it back! Then by the time I moved out, I was too busy to watch it. But once I moved to MD, and didn't have a job for 2 months.. I was sucked in. I think my brain is melting.

I have experienced death up close and personal.. in many ways. Old age, cancer, suicide, drug poisoning, even unknown causes. Death is not easy. And every time I hear about someone passing away, my heart aches. Even if the person isn't close to me. I know death happens every day, and it is the way it is supposed to be. But I can't help but feel sorry for the loved ones left behind to miss them. I lost my mother when I was 19. I still cry at least every week. I didn't have a normal relationship with her when she was alive.. And I wonder if I did, if it would have made her death easier or harder? Everyone needs to cherish what they have with their mom. Don't take it for granted.. Because I did, and I regret it every day.

I have an extremely un healthy obsession with my body. One I struggle with every day. I am slowly learning to stop picking myself apart.

I live 2000 miles away from where I grew up. Never thought that would happen, but it is beautiful here.

I hate beets.

I am the BIGGEST cry baby, ever. I seriously cry over anything and everything. My doctor told me I have a "sensitive soul"

I have the most amazing dad, and I am the biggest daddy's girl. My pops has been through soooo much, and it seems like it just makes him more amazing. He always makes me laugh, I love his singing voice, I miss him allll the time.

I try to dance a little every day. Whether I shake my butt for a second, dance in the car, or full on shake my groove thing.

I am afraid of every bug.

I never wanted kids until I met Erik. And I always swore up and down that I wasn't a jealous person, until I met Erik. Hehe.

Anddd, I think I am done with this post :)

Happy Tuesday everyone.

Addicted?

I am definitely addicted to changing my hair..

If I can't cut it, I will color it. (Vise versa) I loved having short hair, I could do whatever my heart desired! I was in beauty school for esthetics at the time, and we were always finding new and different things to do with my hair. But I decided quite awhile ago that I was going to attempt growing it out. I had pretty long hair in high school, and I missed it. Quite frankly, the only reason I chopped it short was because my friend over processed my hair with bleach and fried it off. (I had a mullet, it was terrible.) So anyways.. Yeah my hair is pretty long again! And don't get me wrong, I love it. But I reallllly miss my short funky hair!
So.. I promised Erik I would grow it out for the wedding, and I have. But after.. I am seriously thinking about cutting it like this..


I love love love it!! (The cut, I can't do the blonde)

Ahhh.. Anyways.. Back to the wedding! So right now my hair is like.. a level 3 probably. It's DARK, almost black (accident, I didn't want it THIS dark..) And the wedding is in the summer, and I usually like my hair somewhat light in the summer. But I am NOT going blonde for my wedding. I am not a blonde, so why should I be on my wedding?? I want a lighter level of brown, and maybe some caramel highlights thrown in.

I love Leighton Meester, she is gorgeous. And I love her on GG :) But anywho.. I want this color! And I want the style too! I am thinking about getting extensions just so I can pull off this big messy hair one day :) Engagements maybe?? Haha


I bet the ladies at work are so sick of me changing my hair.. But I can't help it! I am addicted!

Rude People

Okay, I just have to vent for a second..

It feels like I've been dealing with rude, inconsiderate people A LOT lately. And it's really buggin..

First off, people have ZERO customer service skills anymore. I don't get it!! I've worked with the public with almost every job I've had, and so I know how important it is to have great customer service. But lately, everywhere I go the people are so freakin rude! Ugh it drives me nuts.. probably one of my biggest pet peives.

Okay so there is this girl I know.. and she is the biggest bitch! For real.. I have never done ANYTHING to her, but be nice and welcoming, and what not. Well the last time I saw her, she was seriously so rude. She hardly acknowledges me, ignores me when I try to talk to her, blows me off during conversation, etc etc.. Just a total bitch. Why do people like her think they can treat people so terribly?

Anyways.. Sorry but I had to vent about that :) My next post will be nicer!

A new love..

So you remember that rut I was talking about? Well I am running my way out of it :)

I have found a new love for running.. Which is very unusual for me! I've never enjoyed running. Never. But one day I just got on the treadmill and ran, and ran, and ran. And I truly felt that "runners high." It was amazing.

I definitely have a longgg way to go, I am no pro runner YET! Haha, but I do love seeing me break through walls I never could before! I am slowly, but surely building my endurance.

I have always wanted to be a runner. Run in a 5K, 10K, Half Marathon, maybe one day a full Marathon!! Well.. This June in Annapolis, Zooma (zoomarun.com) is hosting a half marathon, and I am now training for that! :) I cannot tell you how excited/scared/nervous I am!

Also, I am working on doing the 3 Day 60 Mile Walk for the Cure in DC this October!!



I've always been a huge supporter of this cause, and finding a cure. And I have ALWAYS wanted to do this walk.. And I think being able to do it in DC is amazing! I cannot wait! Erik even told me he would do it with me! Now I just have to get together a few more people for our team, get sponsored, and raise some money!!

So if any of you are interested, and wanna come visit the Nations Capitol in October, and walk for the cure.. Let me know :) Or if you even want to donate, just give me a holler when the time comes!

Catch up.

Christmas in Utah.
We had a blast with our family and friends while we were in Utah. Things were crazy hectic (like they usually are when we visit) There are just so many people to see! So I apologize if we missed seeing you :(
We stayed with Rachel and T-Wiz and their kids. It was fun, and not to mention the best kind of birth control.. Haha. Love those kids, but man can they scream!





We spent New Years with our good friends, Whitney and Forrest. We just hung out at our place, played some drinking games, and had good talks! I love those guys!





Now it's back to work and back to reality.. Ugh. Haha. When I was younger, I always said that I wanted to be and independent woman, and never be the stay at home wife. Well now that I have a job.. I think I wanna change my mind! Haha. It's bitter sweet really.. I'd love to stay home, and take care of the house and everything (I already do that now.. :P) And take care of the kiddies one day. But I know I'd get stir crazy!! But all of that is far away.. So right now I will focus on working, saving money, and planning our wedding!!! :)